Urbnlivn: FoREM on Niche Marketing | urbnlivn on Seattle condos
seattle67
· 2 years ago
I agree. Their advertising is far more formulaic than it is creative. Here's my recipe for a downtown condo marketing campaign. 1. Find at least three good-looking models. Make sure they have legs because you're going to need to take lots of photos of them jumping in their air because that's how excited people get when they have an opportunity to read your Public Offering Statement. 2. What's a website without some kind of ambient music playing in the background? I'll tell you, one that's just selling real estate and not a lifestyle! Best way to pick a song, drive downtown to a high-end furniture store, take about 5 seconds from anything you hear them playing and then loop this clip endlessly on your web site. *Important - make sure it is extremely difficult for your site visitors to turn this music off. 3. Sell the dream. For anyone living in downtown Seattle the dream is 'shopping for fresh produce at the Pike Place Market' or 'catching some music at a club on Capitol Hill'. Do not confuse this dream with 'the fact that the produce guys in the market close before you get home in the evening' or 'you stand a good chance of getting whacked on the head with a skateboard on Capitol Hill'. 4. Where relevant tie your property into it's history. Here's an example, suppose you're converting low income housing into high-end condos. In this case you should...um...you should...probably talk about the great views. 5. Give your building a name. Either name it after it's location or create a brand new word as your property's name. Do not name it after something historical or political - who wants to live in the 'WTO Lofts'? If you create a brand new word it is suggested that it end in either an 'x' or an 'a'. For example, if I were a developer I would call my building 'Expensivia'. Can you tell what that is 'condo-marketing speak' for?
mhays
· 2 years ago
seattle67, can I provide your website with detailed information about what square footage and price range I'm looking for, along with my contact information, so you can plaster me with exciting updates about news articles you purchased, and eventually see floorplans and prices after the insiders have snapped up the best ones?
seattle67
· 2 years ago
I think it would be best if you first sent us a completed credit app. That way we can select a custom 'unique in-city experience' that best fits your lifestyle and salary.*
* Please note that the above comment is not an offer to sell, or solicitation of offers to buy, the condominium units in question. Also, we reserve the right, at any time, to modify, alter, update or remove portions of this comment.
mhays
· 2 years ago
Sure thing, filling it out right now. Would you like $10,000 too?
mhays
· 2 years ago
PS, for my personality transformation, I'd like to lose 10 lbs, get a tan, appreciate seven-foot dried grasses in a vase, and find one of those tables that's not big enough for four people but has six chairs.
seattle67
· 2 years ago
Sounds great. Let me get one of our inexperienced, untrained sales reps that we just brought in this morning to help mess up all your paperwork.
downtown
· 2 years ago
you guys are crackin me up......I was at the gallery last week and the marketing and the sales people just about had me laughing my ass off......where do these marketing co's get this crap from...does anybody buy into this bs???? Straight comedy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Steve
· 2 years ago
I think you should change the name of this site to urbnbitchn.com
mattgoyer
· 2 years ago
Steve, that comment made my day. I really don't know why so many commentors are so grumpy.
jo
· 2 years ago
i like to blame the grumpiness on the weather
seattle67
· 2 years ago
i prefer to blame it on Sonics.
seattle67
· 2 years ago
...and I blame it on forms that don't let you preview your comments before they post.
once more...
i prefer to blame it on THE Sonics. :)
EconE
· 2 years ago
I'm not grumpy...I'm just a Curmudgeon
What is a Curmudgeon anyway?
"A curmudgeon's reputation for malevolence is undeserved. They're neither warped nor evil at heart. They don't hate mankind, just mankind's absurdities. They're just as sensitive and soft-hearted as the next guy, but they hide their vulnerability beneath a crust of misanthropy. They ease the pain by turning hurt into humor. . . . . . They attack maudlinism because it devalues genuine sentiment. . . . . . Nature, having failed to equip them with a servicable denial mechanism, has endowed them with astute perception and sly wit. Curmudgeons are mockers and debunkers whose bitterness is a symptom rather than a disease. They can't compromise their standards and can't manage the suspension of disbelief necessary for feigned cheerfulness. Their awareness is a curse. Perhaps curmudgeons have gotten a bad rap in the same way that the messenger is blamed for the message: They have the temerity to comment on the human condition without apology. They not only refuse to applaud mediocrity, they howl it down with morose glee. Their versions of the truth unsettle us, and we hold it against them, even though they soften it with humor."
All Comments
1. Find at least three good-looking models. Make sure they have legs because you're going to need to take lots of photos of them jumping in their air because that's how excited people get when they have an opportunity to read your Public Offering Statement.
2. What's a website without some kind of ambient music playing in the background? I'll tell you, one that's just selling real estate and not a lifestyle! Best way to pick a song, drive downtown to a high-end furniture store, take about 5 seconds from anything you hear them playing and then loop this clip endlessly on your web site. *Important - make sure it is extremely difficult for your site visitors to turn this music off.
3. Sell the dream. For anyone living in downtown Seattle the dream is 'shopping for fresh produce at the Pike Place Market' or 'catching some music at a club on Capitol Hill'. Do not confuse this dream with 'the fact that the produce guys in the market close before you get home in the evening' or 'you stand a good chance of getting whacked on the head with a skateboard on Capitol Hill'.
4. Where relevant tie your property into it's history. Here's an example, suppose you're converting low income housing into high-end condos. In this case you should...um...you should...probably talk about the great views.
5. Give your building a name. Either name it after it's location or create a brand new word as your property's name. Do not name it after something historical or political - who wants to live in the 'WTO Lofts'? If you create a brand new word it is suggested that it end in either an 'x' or an 'a'. For example, if I were a developer I would call my building 'Expensivia'. Can you tell what that is 'condo-marketing speak' for?
* Please note that the above comment is not an offer to sell, or solicitation of offers to buy, the condominium units in question. Also, we reserve the right, at any time, to modify, alter, update or remove portions of this comment.
once more...
i prefer to blame it on THE Sonics. :)
What is a Curmudgeon anyway?
"A curmudgeon's reputation for malevolence is undeserved. They're neither warped nor evil at heart. They don't hate mankind, just mankind's absurdities. They're just as sensitive and soft-hearted as the next guy, but they hide their vulnerability beneath a crust of misanthropy. They ease the pain by turning hurt into humor. . . . . . They attack maudlinism because it devalues genuine sentiment. . . . . . Nature, having failed to equip them with a servicable denial mechanism, has endowed them with astute perception and sly wit.
Curmudgeons are mockers and debunkers whose bitterness is a symptom rather than a disease. They can't compromise their standards and can't manage the suspension of disbelief necessary for feigned cheerfulness. Their awareness is a curse.
Perhaps curmudgeons have gotten a bad rap in the same way that the messenger is blamed for the message: They have the temerity to comment on the human condition without apology. They not only refuse to applaud mediocrity, they howl it down with morose glee. Their versions of the truth unsettle us, and we hold it against them, even though they soften it with humor."
- JON WINOKUR